Don't You Just Hate That Drowning Feeling?

The first away meet of the season. Time to leave our crappy pool. Riding the bus, we saw what we were swimming. I was swimming three events, including the 500. 500 yards. 500 God Damn yards. 20 Laps. 10 times what I'm comfortable with. I was gonna die. Then right after that my next event is the next event. Then my next one a few after that. We get to Lynbrook, and the pool is amazing. Olympic size. 20 lanes. Touch pads. Extremely deep. CLEAN. It even tasted good. You can barely touch the bottom it is so deep. Well the meet started and before I knew it it was the 500. I tighten my goggles so the don't fall off. I get on the block. I dive. My goggles come off. I needed my goggles on, so I can see my lap counters number. Thinking about it as I swim I realize something. My goggles are in front of my nose. I can barely breathe. I start to choke. It felt like I was drowning. Lap one and I'm drowning. But I can't stop. I continue until the end of my second lap when I realize I couldn't take it anymore. I stopped, gasped for air, adjusted my goggles and went on. The laps went by slowly. My arms got tired and there was a pain in my chest. Finally it was over and I was dead. I finished last out of 8 people, about 2 laps behind everyone else. I get out, only to get ready to get back in. Next was a 200 relay. I was the Anchor (yeah... I know...) which means I am the last person to swim. I tighten my goggles more and the race starts. Soon it's my turn. I dive. My goggles come off. But this time around my neck. While swimming, I feel like I am drowning again. I look down and it feels like my watery grave. The beautiful pool looks like a cemetary. I had to get out. But I can't. I finished my 50 and got out. But the race wasn't over yet. Our coaches told us repeaditly not to get out until everyone is finished. So I jump back in. The guy with the microphone says, "Lane 1 is disqualified for jumping back in the water." I DQed my relay. I groan, and get out slowly. I star to walk away but my teammates hold me back. "No it's all right. Everyone gets DQed!" But I just wanted to be alone. The coach has a talk with me about it. At the end she says, "oh and good job on the 500." I say "sure" and walk away. I hate it when they lie. I know they are lying and it makes me feel worse. I decide to go swim in the warm up section to cool down. 10 minutes later its my third race. A 400 relay. Anchor again, I tighten my goggles like hell, and I dive. My goggles didn't fall off. But again with the drowning feeling. Now with goggles I saw my tomb more clearly. I finished with nothing bad happening, except that we got 7th out of 8. As I get out I hear my other coach say "Nice Jonathan!" which only hurts me more. I sulk for the rest of the meet. I liked it better when I had only one race. Then I had less races to screw up.